[E-voting] DRAFT: letter to the Special Group on Public Service Numbers and Expenditure Programme
jm at jmason.org
Mon Feb 16 10:23:11 GMT 2009
On Mon, Feb 16, 2009 at 10:02, <A.J.Delaney at brighton.ac.uk> wrote:
> I have a small issue with the phrase "considerable contention" (point 2
> on page 2). I think you're using the computer science definition of
> contention and am unsure that a non-computer science reader would
> understand it. I suggest that you change this to
> "As such, were e-voting to be trialled in Ireland as originally planned,
> considerable delays may have occurred causing significant queuing at
> polling stations. Such a decrease in quality of service would
> necessitating the purchase of even more e-voting machines."
fwiw, I also found the phrasing of the tenses (in both versions) a little
confusing. I suggest:
"As such, were e-voting to be trialled in Ireland as originally planned,
considerable delays may occur, causing significant queuing at polling
stations. Such a decrease in quality of service would necessitate the
purchase of even more e-voting machines."
otherwise looks good to me!
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